Western Carolina will make its way from the bucolic setting, between the Great Smoky Mountains and the Blue Ridge Mountains of “The Old North State”, to do battle with the mighty Alabama Crimson Tide. The Catamounts of Cullowhee… Wait! What! Ho! I’m two weeks ahead of myself! I got so caught up in the hype of this impending clash that I almost forgot about the business at hand THIS Satday, Alabama and LSU.

More on that one later.

The past two week’s blogs have dealt, to some extent, with our old DEE-Luxe, 1970 something Pontiac Astre, Old Yellow. Two weeks ago I made mention of the time that Old Yellow was diagnosed with a “blew gasket” by the good folks at the old Gulf station in downtown Auburn on College Street.

More on that later.

When I was a freshman at Auburn, in the fall quarter of 1970 and the winter quarter of 1971, I made my residence at 332 W. Glenn St., in The Loveliest Village of the Plains. Mr. And Mrs. Bruce Peak were the owners of the old two story abode, and it was equipped with three private rooms on the second floor, which male students, at the time, were allowed to rent. $30 a month. No air, no tv, and no phone (the three of us did, later, pool our resources, and had a shared phone installed), but there was a community refrigerator in the hallway, where the phone was set up. WooHoo! Uptown!

One of my fellow renters, in that winter quarter of ’71, was a most congenial fellow by the name of John Norton. John was a jazz pianist, as well. Alvin Baggett, who hailed from Repton, AL, was down the hall from John and me.

Well, one day John returns to his room, after classes, and proceeds to show me this ticket he received from one of Auburn’s finest. The charge? “Cutting a koner.” Yep. Spelling was not the officer’s forte and John mocked him with a mixture of both glee and disdain. The location of this heinous traffic violation? Yep! The Gulf station on College Street (and almost adjacent to the Sani-Freeze, or the Sani-Flush, as she was affectionately known. Still is).

I say that to say this. Don’t go “cuttin’ koners” at the Gulf station on College Street, in Auburn, AL, or one day you just might have a friend who winds up with a blew gasket.

The End.

P.S. Alvin Baggett had an accounting class with Pat Sullivan, and I had Mickey Mouse Math with Terry Beasley, in the Fall of ’70. Don’t mess with the boys at 332 W. Glenn Street!

If I had not picked Florida to upset Georgia, I would have, finally, scored my first perfect week of picks. Dadgummit! (Another $1 to Bobby Bowden. He’s staring to pick up a nice cash flow from these beautiful blogs. My words, certainly not anyone else’s). Our season record now stands at 65-17 after that 5-1 finish last week. That’s a pct. of .792. Continue onward to 80%, fellow football fans!

Vanderbilt vs. Florida

The Water Lizards are still smartin’ from their loss at The World’s Largest Cocktail Party, but even if they are a bit beaten and bruised, there will be enough Gator gumption for Dancin’ Dan Mullen to dunk Anchorman Derrick Mason and company in The Swamp. (Oh Will Ferrell, where art thou!?) Florida 42, Vanderbilt 14

Arkansas vs. Western Kentucky

The Piggies are but a 1.5 favorite over the Hoppin’ Hilltoppers. Dang! Hits done got sho’ nuff’ YOU-gly up in Fayetteville! After getting hammered by 30, at home, to the Bullies from StarkVegas, do the Hawgs have ANYTHING left in their collective tank? Not much, I do suppose. Not much. SMH. Surely Chad Morris’s ‘Backs can get it done against the boys from Bowling Green. If not, he may be unemployed on Monday. Arkansas 30, Western Kentucky 28.

Ole Miss vs. New Mexico State

The Ole and the New! How ’bout dat!? Maybe the Aggies from Las Cruces (is it me or does New Mexico State seem to play an inordinate number of SEC teams?) can bring some green chile stew and stacked red chile enchiladas with them for that wonderful tailgate experience in The Grove. That would be nice. What won’t be nice is the tail whuppin’ the Johnny Rebs are gonna paste on their hineys! Ole Miss 40, New Mexico State 13

Georgia vs. Missouri

Kitties and Pups, ‘Twixt the Shrubs! UGA’s litter looks to be the easy choice here, but, watch out for the visitors who will be a scratchin’ and a clawin’ its heart out. Canines are -16.5, and may very well cover that, but not before a street fight. Kirby and Barry will match wits and the homies will pull it out for their rabid fans. Georgia 31, Missouri 14.

South Carolina vs. Appalachian State

The Mountaineers were ranked number 20 before they got themselves a bad case of them Statesboro Blues last Satday. Georgia Southern put them in their place and now the Booners will be looking to rebound down in Columbia, SC. The Roosters will be crown’ and lookin’ to put wins back to back after disposing of some Commodores back in week 10. The hosts should win but will they cover the 5.5? Here’s to a yes on that one, barely. South Carolina 27, App State 21.

Kentucky vs. Tennessee

Two East division squads lookin’ to do some bowlin’ here in 2019. The Vowels are 4-5 and the Felines are 4-4. The moon will ba a shinin’ and the muskets a blazin’ on what should be a frosty night up in the Bluegrass. But it’ll be hot down on the field of Kroger. Here’s to that home field advantage for Mark (FSU?) Stoops and the Bourbon State boys. Kentucky 31, Tennessee 28.

And now, that matter of numbers two and three in the initial College Football Playoff Poll, and also in the rankings of yours truly! I was happy to receive that vindication, and also Ohio State at number one! The committee missed on number four. Should be Clemson.

Alabama vs. LSU

The visiting Bayou Bengals are a six point underdog to the hometown Crimpson Tide. Nick Saban will be more than happy to be sluggin’ this one out in T-Town, but history shows they have fared as well or better down in Red Stick. That one is a head scratcher. No matter. Bama has reeled off eight straight against LSWHO and they are rarin’ to make it nine. Joe Burrow and his talented group of wide receivers are quite formidable, but there is no one in the USA that can match Tua and the absolutely superb gang of wideouts from West Vance. Coach Ed “Yaw Yaw Yaw Football” Orgeron will have his Felines extremely well-prepared. Don’t think the Pachyderms won’t be, as well. Special teams will play a big role here and turnovers and penalties will too. This is gonna be one for the ages. In two overtimes. Alabama 45, LSU 42.

Hoo Hoooo, Mercy! Football!!!

Next week our AU version of Fightin’ Felines will return to action. Smart and Malzahn will square on The Plains. Gus is 9-0 coming of a bye week. The Dawgs are scramblin’ to win the East and have a shot at the playoff. Something’s got to give! It should be a dandy! Stay tuned!

And…

Take real good care out there and be sure to love your neighbor as yourself!